read it

Voor school moet ik ook af en toe dingen doen. Ik heb het vak engels en dat slaat eigenlijk nergens op, maar toch krijg ik er punten voor, dus ja, dan moet je wat. Ik moet allerlei dingen inleveren en maken en doen enzo, en dit stuk hieronder is een voorbeeld. Het heeft me 20 minuutjes gekost, maar het resultaat is denk ik voor iedereen wel leuk om te lezen, want het geeft een goed beeld van wat ik nou eigenlijk doe en wil!

Enjoy.

More than just a four-year study. – Lydia de Leur

I can remember saying to myself I would never start studying, I have learned enough of the last 7 years of high school. Frankly, that did not really come true. Because here I am, almost done with my first year of a very special study, all the way in Almere. Not many people know about it, and even less really know what is means, or what to do with it. Curious? Read all about it

Studying applied Biologie is nothing like any other study. It is a combination of many different aspects , all supporting the subject biology, to make it into something more useful.

Just look at it, what is the point of knowing how a flower exactly grows, but not using that knowledge to change things in an ecosystem so that they can grow better? Applied biology is all about making combinations between knowledge and wisdom.

Before I started, I did not really know what it was all about. I had read the information about it and just the idea that nature and city can come together in one study made it so interesting for me. Because the study was all new, there were no examples of lessons, and they could not say what kind of things we would learn. So, the first day at school, I really found out what this study was for me. Now, almost a year ahead, I see this was just the right choice for me. I love to learn about plants, and you know why? Because when I learn something in the morning, I can go outside in the afternoon and see what I learned. I learn about what I see around me, and because of that, I see more and more things in nature that amazes me. And because of that, I want to learn more and more about it. It’s a circle that goes on and on and I’ll never stop learning.

Now, at this age, you have to start thinking about future. My school and study both encourages me to think about my future, and how they can impart with that. There are two different futures I think about. First of all, my own future. Who do I want to become, what do I want with my life? Second, is the future of this world and how I can be a part of that. I believe this world we live in today is slowly turning into one big mess. We spoil ourselves, taking the world for granted. It gives us everything we need, but people care about money more than they care about their own lives, or the ones of others. When I think about the second future, I hope me and my study can change a lot. I am not very optimistic when it comes to all these new technologies and improvements. I think my task is to make people see the problem. To make them see we are the problem of our own trouble. My study can provide a lot of knowledge about what is wrong with the world and how it effect all different kinds of ecosystems. I also think it helps me to gain a lot of wisdom when it comes to searching for solutions.

I hope this study will help me to find a good way to express my passion to others, and to let them see how important nature is, not only for me, but for all human kind.

Weer/Again

Dus.

Ik ga weer weg.

Naar Amerika.

Maar het voelt niet als weg gaan.

Het voelt als thuiskomen.

Na al die tijd ja.

Nog steeds.

En weer dat rare gevoel van binnen.

Zo anders als vorige keer,

Maar toch ook zo herkenbaar.

Een spanning,

Een blijdschap,

Een angst en een verlangen.

Weer weet ik het niet.

Welk gevoel overheerst.

Het ene moment de blijdschap,

Het ander moment de angst.

So.

I'm leaving again.

To America.

But it doesn't feel like leaving.

It feels like coming home.

After all that time yes.

Still.

And again that weird feeling inside.

So different from the last time,

but also so identifiable.

A tension,

A cheerfulness,

A fear and a desire.

But once more, I don't know.

What feeling dominates me.

One moment it is cheerfulness,

the other moment it's fear.

Wat nu?

Now what?

Blijven ademen. En wegvliegen naar huis.

Keep breathing. And fly away home.

Lydia

Pictures from the dress

Finaly, some pictures from Friday. I had almost forgotten it.

With my friend Maarten. We did look good :)

Here you see my whole dress. My mom made it for me, and I LOVE IT. I felt so good in it, and so unique.

My mom made me a handbag too, and I made this thing for in my hear. I felt like a princes.

LOVE

In/out side

It's so nice and warm outside, I hardly am inside anymore!

And ...

There I go again!

Herman and Teun.

There is going to be a movie of it ( with more things in it) but my computer is So slowly and I need to convert the files and that takes for ever and I can't find a proper programme for that, SO.....

Take it or leave it.

Herman and Teun are two Pumpkins. I've been waiting for them, and from the very beginning from when they were very little, I took care of them. I am their mother, and I love it!

Herman was my first born, and you can see that, because Herman is Taller than Teun. On the other hand, Teun is a bit bigger. Like his leafes are a bit bigger, they grow a bit faster.

Teun and Herman came as a total surprise. My mother had some pumpkinseeds left from a long time ago when we ate pumpkin myself ( something I can never do anymore). As an experiment I put two pumpkins in some soil and gave them water. 4 days later, nothing happened yet. I wanted to give up and throw it all away. But the next morning, O, what I saw there!! Two little, cute, but beautiful pumpkin-beginnings.

And now look at it! They are ready to go into the wild, outdoors!

And I can't wait to see how they grow, day by day!

Our biggest blessing

You know what I like best about our brain?

The ability to remember. There are many reasons why I like this best about our brain. I think you can figure out some reasons yourself.

What I would like, is you to write down a memory you remembered ( ok, you can't tell any memory you can't remember, because that isn't a memory anymore, but oke). It can be something good, horrible, some time you were alone, with many, together with me. It can be a memory of something you did for the first time, or last. The best memory, or the worst. The sweetest or most sour. Anything you want to share. Because sharing has this magical thing, too. Because you share something, I will remember it. Your memory you write down will become my memory. That is awesome, because in that way we have a connection so very sweet and personal.

So.

Let's do this.

I'll start.

I remember that I learned to eat Pineapple. I worked at the vegtable-store in my neighborhood and Michael the King ( that's really his name) was my boss. He is the most amazing boss I've ever had. He was(and still is) very nice to me, and we got friends pretty easy. I like fruit, and vegtables, but not so much... escpecially fruit. Michael knew that. I told him. He once said to me, when I was cutting the Pineapple for in the fruitsalade : Lydia, you have to try pineapple. I said : no, I don't like pineapple. He said : JUST TRY., you'll love my pineapples. So i tried. Of course, at that moment I couldn't admit it, but later on! I couldn't stop eating it. The fruit salade was with a lot less pineapple. Michael the King thaught me to eat Pineapple, and I am SOOOO happy he did!

What's your memory?

( I will only post a new blog when I have 10 comments. So....)

Lydia

NOT GOOD

I don't feel good at all.

After I was done with my Dutch Exam I felt pretty good. But this evening I decided to see the answers.. No good. I got all warm inside and it kind of hit me in the wrong way. I have made many mistakes, I didn't understand the text where I had to make Summery for AT ALL and I got it all wrong. Man, that just sucks, really. It makes me really sad, and also a bit angry. And Anxious for tomorrow.. And for my Re-exams.. Man o man..

All that time I hadn't any stress at all, but now it will not stop. I am warm, and my stomach hurts a bit, and I can't chill down and I can't relax. I've never had this before. Not like this. Not for school.

Tomorrow I have Math, so I can trust on my knowledge and commen sense. That makes it better. I know I'm good at Math.. Just keep saying that, and it will be allright.

I'm going to look it over one more time.

And forget about this day's exam. It's oke... Calm down. Relax.. drink some hot milk.. think about sunshine.

Lydia

Reflections on Minnesota

I feel obligated to type some out here, because I know I have been failing a bit. It's not that I am so superbusy with school and such. No, I have no worries about that.

It's more that there are so many other things to do!

For example, I am home alone. Yesterday, today, tomorrow. Pretty sweet, but it takes some time.. I clean up a bit, and do the dishes, and water the plants.. Then I wanted to do the loan, but I didn't.

Yesterday I was reading in my journal, some of almost a year ago. The time when I realized that going back to Holland maybe isn't that easy as it sounds. I realized then that I am changed in America, and that it would be hard to hold onto the new things about myself. I was scared, because I wanted people to see I am changed from the inside, but I didn't want that friendships would change because of that. I wanted people to be the same, yet in the same time be also different. I guess that is just how it goes, because after 10 months everyone has to be changed somehow in something. I think I got a lot of those little changes, because I was in such a different surrounding. I had so many people around me who I never knew. This culture ( yes, America Has culture) was new and the good things I wanted to keep and take back to Holland. But I also wanted the good things of Holland. I think it was easier to be somewhat more Dutch in America than to be a little American in Holland. People are different here. And in America, people are different,too. But I have to stay the same person? Do I needed to change myself in order to be friends with the Americans, but returning to Holland I can still be my Dutch self? No, I don't think it works like that at all. Things that happen, and people, and experiences.. they make you who you are and what you do. ( Ok, true, God makes me who I am and what I do, but these things also do that, not because you want to all the time, but just because that is how the world works) They add in your personality many different things and you take them with you in your journey. I kept some things from America in me, and some of Holland. I can not be only American, or Only Dutch. It is just who I became. I don't think it's a bad thing. It's just hard sometimes, because I could feel I belong nowhere. Luckily, I know that is not true, but my hearts is torn in two. That will not change, I think. Being in Holland makes me miss America ( every day, people!) but being in America makes me want to go back to HOlland. Why do these things need to be so difficult??

You know whatreally got me through( and still does)? Knowing that God is everywhere, and no matter where I am, HE is the same, and HE is allways with me, and HE never changes. Why would it matter then where my true home is? As long as GOD is with me ( which He is) I am home.

Lydia

SOG 2

WOrdless Wednesday - Worthless Wednesday
Woordeloze woensdag - waardeloze woensdag

Letters

You know what you should do?
Write a letter.
Not type it.
Write it.
Put a poststamp on the envelope and write a name of someone you love on it. The Adress in bold letters.
Then walk to the mailbox and first kiss it before you release it. It disappears with all the other letters and when you walk back to your house you start it imagen the wonderful trip the letter will make. It gives it character, it gives a story.

You should write about normal day things where you never really talk about. About flowers, or what the world thaught you today. You should send it to someone you would probably never recieve a letter from.

I am reading a book which is made out of letters. Only letters. It is wonderful and I wish we all wrote eachother more letters. It's sadthe computer made everything go so fast.
The guernsey Literary and Potato Piel Pie Society is a wonderful book. It makes me wanna write letters all the time in a "letter"style.. You talk differently to someone else when you wrtie him or her a letter. You should try. Your words are different\, your subjects are different.

You should do it.

Dutch lesson no 1

Dutch Lesson number one:


This is called:
Gigantisch grote blauwe plek.

It is my leg.
I run into a metal chain. Not on purpose. I tried to jump over it. Didn't work.
I'm blue dabadiedabeda,be da be die da be da da be die da be da...
something like that.

Mouse hunt!

This crazy good day can't be described in words at all, because it was way to amazing for that. But I do want to highlight ONE little thing that just made me... laugh.

SO. Mulan, I've introduced him to you as my horse. It's not my horse, it's Max's horse. Max is 61 and my friend. We were at Mulan today, and we were talking about all the mice in our little barn. There were many mice, and I even found one in Mulan's food! So, time to do something about it. Max had bought some mousetrap, but the smart mice already ate the cheese off..

BUT. Sometimes, my brains work very well. Because about a week ago i found that mouse in Mulan's food, kind of seeds they look like. SO, i decided to put some food on the mousetraps.

And guess what.

Half an hour later Max finds a mouse, dead in the trap! We laugh, because it only took half an hour! So, I remove the mouse, take away some of the blood, when I see in my eyecorner that the other mousetrap is ALSO filled. With a death mouse! We laugh even harder. Just for fun, we check the third trap, too! And I know you can't believe it, But there was a death mouse in it! THree mouses dead in half an hour! Can you believe it? Man, that was some good laughter i had for something so small! So we threw the death mice away and set new traps.

Five minutes later, I heard a sound that sounded like a mousetrap closing. I looked. The mousetrap was closed, no mouse.

I will look agian tomorrow, I know there will be more death mice tomorrow.

Is it that bad to laugh about death mice??

I know now

You know what ym dad does what he has a little bit of time left?

He watched the news. First at channel 1, thatn 2, than 3. And I was sorting out my mail, so I could hear the news too. Three times. I think it's kind of stupid my dad watches it three times, but I do see the benefit of it, too.

Because my dad watched the news three times, I now know everything about the cloud of ash coming from a vulcano from iceland. I know that is is about 5 kilometers high, and that many flights are cancelled, and that there are many people sleeping on the airport tonight and that the cloud will only go away if the wind changes or if it is going to rain but that is not very likely. They do not know how much it will cost eventually, and when the problem will be over.

Because my dad watched the news three times, I now know that Guus Hiddink is no longer the coach of the Belgium soccer team, he left after half a year. He is also coach at AZ ( dutch soccer team). It is not totally true, but most likely he will become coach of the national soccerteam of Russia.

I also know now that the game between Ajax and Feyenoord ( two dtuch soccer teams) will be held two times, and that only the supporters of the team playing in their own place can come, so there won't be many fights..

I mean, I wouldn't have known all this if my dad didn't watched the news three times in a row..

WOW.

Lydia

What she said

Today was a good day.

I followed advice from Mirjam and just did things I liked ALL DAY LONG.

Sleep till 9.30, went with my little big brother to Utrecht to buy AMAZING clothe ( Simon did a good job, his new clothe are SOOO awesome) we ate real Belgium fries with REAL mayonaise, we walking in and out of shops, observed weird people in trains ( do you have ANY idea how cool it is to sit in a train and just look around and see other people having their life at the same time as you.. there was this lady on the phone hearing some kid she knew was catched by the police because of something really bad and we could hear her say everything! I would have liked some privacy, but she didn't need it. And there was this girl sitting next to me and her hair was really nice and she had this voice that reminded me of someone else. And Simon could see this guy make a nice computer graph design thing for a dutch soccerteam. And this ALL in 2 sqaure meters.. Isn't that unbelievable, how worlds can be so close and yet So far from eachother??)

ANYWAYS, I went to my horse, which was really sweet. I found a mouse in his food.. I wanted to kil it after I had catched it, but it run away faster than I could follow, so he got lucky.

And tonight I just have been hanging out with the computer and the mail I need to deliver tomorrow....

I will sleep tonight and not wake up early tommorow.

Love

Big time motown loving!

O How i loved this evening.
and how I loved this WIG! haha.
Theme : Motown!

Singing Sir Duke from Stevie Wonder. good party!

Sining You will Know from Stevie Wonder. five girls acapellla, three different voices, silent. SWEET

Playing the bass at You can't hurry love from Diana Ross!

Yes, I had a jolly good time!

Love, Lydia

The juice adventure - 7,8

So, yesterday it was my last day of only drinking the juice and that went pretty good.

TOday, I started my day with orangejuice. O my, what a sweetness! And I also bought rice wafles. I can'teat much, because my body has to get used to it.

SO, I have been thinking about conclusions and here they come:

- It is actually possible for me not to eat for 7 days in a row. I never knew I could, and I am so happy I did it!

- You have so much time left when you do not eat. It's was so easy just to drink something when I was hungry in between everything else I was doing. Dinertime was now just showertime, or readtime.. That was sweet!

- There is So much food we eat we REALLy don't need.

- We are tempted to eat food all the time. There are so many ways to get food, that it's almost hard not to fall for those things. Like is said Monday, when my mum and I were at the market and we didn't have to think about buying something.. Normally you would be tempted to buy at least something!

- Drinking 2 liters juice a day makes you go to the restroom ALL THE TIME.

- eating more healthy would probably make me feel a lot better.

I lost about 4 Kilo's and you can see that. That is sweet, but I wasn't doing it for that. Of course, I will try to keep it like this, because it looks good and it feels amazing too.

For the coming three days I wil think about how I will change my lifestyle into a ( more) healthy one.

Lovely day to you all!

Lydia

the list after the stress tests week PART 2

of the seven things I wrote down a two months ago i wanted to do, I already did 4 of them!
1. Get a ticket to America : DONE
2. Save money to pay it : DONE
3. do more horsebackriding : DONE
4. get my Cd done and realy for sale : DONE

Now I only have to do:
1. Get connected with friends again. I am already doing better in that, but school is important, too! Praying goes a lot better
2. Buy a coloringbook. Still have to do that. why not!?
3. Organize the songs you have been written lately. I kind of did that, but not really. I guess I can do that when Idon't want to study anymore.

Actually, it's pretty good to scroll back a bit in your life and see what is done what you've wanted. because now i realize I'm doing pretty good with it!

Another thing, somtimes i write down my prayers. And looking back how many have been answered, it's just amazing! How many times do we forget, like REALLY? would be great to make a list like this, and don't stop praying till i have all answers.
Well, I better never stop praying anyways. And you shouldn't either.

Love,
Lydia
ps, two posts at one day. What is happening?

The juice adventure -6

This day I didn't felt so great.
I was tired, and hungry all the time.. Maybe because It was monday, that is a good option.
But yeah, I noticed that I haven't felt any greater.. Like, My mum has many improvements and she is doing just wonderful and has much energy, but I am just like normal. Don't feel bad, but don't feel superior.

So this day, I just lived. The one nice thing was when my mum and I were at the market. Because normally you get crazy about everything you smell, and you want to buy fish, and chips, and bread.. and whatever, but this time. We just smelled the good food, and didn;t think about buying it. That was a nice thing!

I kind of want to start writing down conclusions, because this feels like the last day. Tomorrow is the last day that I will not eat at all. After that, I'll have three days of not eating nothing, but gradually getting used to food again. Iam planning on eating superhealthy, because I feel like I can make a good start now.
Day six was more a day of thinking about day 7 and the three builing up- days ( or whatever you call those days) than worrying about this day. I guess that's a good thing..

Of course, I have many other things to say, But if I do, my title is not right anymore.. SO
Lydia

The juice adventure - 3,4,5

Dear readers,

The reason why I am not writing to you anymore is because I am doing very well.

Drinking the juice has become more and more normal. I have found this kind of system that works very well. Every hour I get hungry, so i drink some. In that way, I never feel hungry, and the juice is actually helping me to feel better, and not otherwise.
Another thing I learned, is that I don't need to put to much pepper in it. That makes is very horrible. So I kind of left that out of it, and that taste a lot better!

I'm actually quite surprised that I hanven't eaten anything since tuesday night. I mean, I never thought I could do that! Yes, I do miss the food. Yesterday at Scouting, they were eating hamburgers, and I couldn't eat it.. that was a hard part. But then, I was at home and saw my dad eating a hawaii Pizza, and I really don't like Hawaii Pizza's, so I was glad I didn't have to eat that.

Other that the hard parts of day, I just enjoy all the time i have left not having to eat. Waking up goes very easy ( I sleep very good ) and I don't have to eat before going to school, just make some juice and drink it the way to school. Also dinertime. There's about an hour time when you normally would eat. In stead , I just chill, or have a shower, or anything else.It's actually not that bad, having more time.

My mum ( who does the same as me) is realy feeling better. She sleeps better, and her joints don't hurt that much anymore, and she has a log of energy! It's great to hear! I don't really have those things to say, but maybe that will come...

Have a wonderful sunday,

Lydia

The juice adventure - 2

I live on ups and downs.
7.15 AM Wake up - Feel pretty good, no hunger i think

7.18 AM - O , I am hungry. But I think this day will be okay

8.00 AM - Just made some juice, Not looking forward to it. Decided to drink a whole bunch now. Here it comes.

8.02 Am Not a good decicion. Everything came out again, not it is in the Toilet. Weird, I don't feel weak or anything now. Actually, i feel pretty good now.

10.00 AM - i am going to give up. If my stomach throws everything out again, it is clearly that it does not want it. It's ot healthy, there you go. That's a good excuus.

11.47 AM My friend D. Tells me not to drink to much at once. She's good to me, helps me getting through it.

3.10 PM Horseriding. Just had a few sips of it and feels fine now. Weather is So lovely, I totally forget to think about food or anything.

4.30 PM Still on the Horse. I think I fuond out a rythm to survive. Because if I only drink when my stomach begins to complain, I don't feel like vomitting or anything. And the hunger is gone too. So, that's what I am going to do, only drink when you really need vitamins or calories.

6.15 PM The food smells So good. They have these italian kind of bread things ( I LOVE BREAD) and they smell like heaven. I decided to take a shower.

6.45 PM In the shower with a groaning stomach. that feels weird, never done that before. I guess I'll make some more juice after I'm done here.

8.00 PM Feeling pretty good. Haven't eaten for 50 hours now. That's a new record.

I have to pie all the time. Never had that, it's coming out like a fountain, crazy! Have to go every hour, hello....

9.21 PM have about half a liter left. I'll finish it. Day 2 only, I know it's just day 2, but I thought i was going to give up yesterday. Tomorrow I will not be a loser, I'll not talk about it all the time. Don't pay attention to it .

Just drink.

Lyd